So. This weekend made me realize many, many things. Foremost, my friendship means shit to people. I'm not worth the toilet paper you use to wipe your ass. And it kills me. I've honestly tried my best to have so much respect for my friends and even people I don't know. It's my parents I usually don't respect much. Maybe I should change that. Since people don't give a shit about me anyway.
There are some moments in your life that are so horrible you think will only happen once in your life. I was so wrong. And the worst part about it is that when it happens again, it doesn't hurt any less. Especially when you trust a person so, so much. I do believe the more you give your trust, the more you're bound to lose. Unfortunately.
The next thing I've come to realize is that I am not meant to be here. Not on Earth. Not anywhere. Not anywhere that actually exists anyway... No, I don't belong here and it makes me sad 'cuz there's no where else to go. And imagine. Life is hard enough when you belong here. And I'm not crazy. I'm just too ready to leave this place. I want to be as far as possible from people who always want to get ahead in life. Always wanting to claw their way to the top. Even if it means betraying your good friend.
I want to find my place.
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